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The one word most mothers ignore that leads to all kinds of trouble

OpinionThe one word most mothers ignore that leads to all kinds of trouble

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In a world that constantly bombards mothers with rigid standards and its expectations, it’s time to champion the power of acceptance. As mothers, we often find ourselves grappling with insecurities and regrets, burdened by the weight of self-doubt. But what if, instead of striving for unattainable perfection, we chose to embrace acceptance? Acceptance of ourselves, our flaws, and our journey as mothers. Acceptance that acknowledges that we are doing our best and our best is enough.

Leaving my young son with my family when I left for medical school was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made. As I packed my bags and said goodbye, a torrent of worries flooded my mind. Would he feel abandoned? Would the separation harm our bond? The fear of being physically apart from him weighed heavily on my heart, overshadowing the excitement of pursuing my professional dreams. 

Yet, amidst the uncertainty, I held onto the belief that this sacrifice was necessary for our future. I reassured myself that my family would provide him with the love and care he deserved in my absence. Each night on the phone we would talk about meeting in our dreams and all of the adventures we would go on together in our dreams. Though the separation was heartbreaking, it was also an opportunity for growth—for both him and me. Through the distance, our bond only strengthened, fueled by love, dedication, and the shared hope for a brighter tomorrow.

My story is not unique. Motherhood for every woman is a story fraught with challenges, uncertainties, and sacrifices. Yet, amidst the clamor of daily life, it’s so important for mothers stop questioning ourselves and allowing insecurities and regret consume us. We have to recognize that every decision we make, every sacrifice we endure, is driven by an unwavering love for our families. Whether it’s juggling a career, managing a household, or navigating the complexities of parenting, everything we do is rooted in a deep-seated desire to provide the best possible life for the ones we love. 


The ability to accept ourselves as women, as mothers, liberates us from the suffocating grip of comparison and judgment. Instead of measuring ourselves against unattainable standards set by society or social media, we must learn to embrace our unique journey and celebrate our individual strengths. There is not a one-size-fits-all approach to motherhood. Each mother, each family, is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. And that’s OK.

Nicole Saphier, M.D., Fox News medical contributor

Nicole Saphier, M.D. has served as a FOX News Channel (FNC) contributor since 2018, breaking down the latest medical news across all platforms.

Accepting that perfection is not real is the first step towards finding contentment. In a world that often glorifies flawlessness, we have to recognize that perfection is a myth—an unattainable ideal that only serves to breed dissatisfaction and self-doubt. In my new book, “Love Mom,” I share three extraordinary stories from moms that are centered on acceptance with incredible insights on how they were able to do so. I believe Jill Churchill said it best when she spoke,

There is not a one-size-fits-all approach to motherhood

“There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.” 


True growth begins when we embrace imperfection, understanding that it is our flaws and mistakes that make us human. By letting go of the impossible quest of being “perfect” and the ideals of what people say we should be, we open ourselves up to a journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance. It’s through our imperfections that we learn, evolve, and ultimately become our most authentic selves. 

It took a long time to release myself from the shackles of perfectionism and embrace the beauty of imperfection—in fact, it took decades into motherhood for me to let go of the stigma of having been a teen mom. As I looked around me, I couldn’t help but be overwhelmed by the beauty of my life—the love of family and the abundance of blessings that surrounded me. 

I realized that my constant worry about being better, achieving more, was robbing me of the simple joy of living in the present moment. In my pursuit of perfection, I had lost sight of the richness of life unfolding before me. It was a wake-up call—an invitation to let go of the incessant need for proving the naysayers wrong and instead embrace the life of the here and now.


In the end, raising children is not about perfection; it’s about love, resilience, and finding contentment. It’s about embracing our imperfections and vulnerabilities and celebrating our authenticity. When we begin to accept who we are, we find the courage to be unapologetically ourselves.

By releasing the grip of expectation and celebrating our unique motherhood path for what it is—a beautiful tapestry of highs and lows, triumphs and challenges—we liberate ourselves from the chains of self-doubt. In doing so, we open our hearts to a deeper sense of joy, gratitude, and life, allowing us to cherish each moment with our children and savor the beauty of the imperfect, yet extraordinary, journey of motherhood.



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